North Kingstown Celebrates Pride
“We want to highlight that identities and people cannot be erased — and that when we come together, we are more powerful than any words on a piece of paper can be."
Towards an Anti-Racist North Kingstown (TANK) organized North Kingstown’s 3rd Annual Pride Parade on Sunday. The first Pride event of the season (by my count), the family-friendly celebration began at the Wickford Town Dock, proceeded through Wickford Village, and concluded with a celebration on the grounds of Wickford Middle School, featuring vendors, community organizations, food trucks, and entertainment.
“We want to highlight that identities and people cannot be erased — and that when we come together, we are more powerful than any words on a piece of paper can be,” said Jennifer Lima, TANK President.
In light of recent harmful federal directives targeting transgender individuals, TANK affirmed its unwavering position that “trans rights are human rights, and there is no LGBTQ without the T and the Q.” As a result, this year’s event centered and uplifted transgender individuals from North Kingstown and beyond.
“Pride is not just a celebration — it is a visible stand for dignity, equality, and resistance against efforts to roll back hard-won protections,” said organizers in a statement. “Gathering as a community reminds LGBTQ+ individuals and their allies that they are not alone.”
There was a short speaking program. Here’s the video:
Alexis is the President of the Sexuality and General Alliance (SAGA) at North Kingston High School.
“SAGA’s been around since 2011,” said Alexis. “You’ll find GSAs in many high schools across the country, in all different sizes. Some specialize in advocacy in otherwise hateful districts, some provide a safe space, and others are just group hangout spots. We at SAGA try to do all three.
“It’s only been a year for me, but being president of a GSA Club has taught me many things: How to work with school faculty, how to communicate more effectively, and how to provide communication for those in need. Most of all, it has allowed me to find joy in what I do.
“I’m transgender, and when I was 13, I began confiding in those around me that I was not a man. I had been feeling like I wanted to be a girl for years, but it reached a breaking point one afternoon in school. That day, I told my friend Tessa, whom I’ve known all my life, to refer to me by they/them pronouns. I now go by she/her. A couple of weeks later, I was hanging out with my grandaunt Gloria. The agony of my identity had been somewhat alleviated since I told Tessa, but thoughts persisted. “You’ll always be a boy. This new name is ugly.” Anything my brain could tell me to prevent me from telling someone else.
“I wanted to anyway. My Auntie Glor is Catholic, and I perceived that as a threat, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t care. What I cared about most in that moment was breaking the news to another. When I had told Tess, it was a rush of validation as if all my questions about the universe had been answered. So, despite the fears and risks that I invented for myself, I told her. For a moment, my Auntie didn’t emote. An incredibly expressive woman, moments ago she had been dancing to old Italian music, and now she simply stared. At first, I thought she hadn’t heard me, but as I rose to speak again, she told me that she was happy I had told her.
“Glor and I spoke for a while about what this meant for my identity, my future, but at the end of the conversation, she told me something I’ll never forget: ‘Alexis, to tell you the truth, I don’t even care. Life’s too short. Carpe diem, I say. Do you know what that means? It means ‘seize the day.’ Carpe diem, Alexis.’ And she really talks like that.
“More than 2000 years ago, the Roman poet Horace penned those two words when he wrote the Odes. The Romans were people who had very little time to prove themselves and to live with. Their society cared deeply about merit and name. So they said Carpe Diem. When Glor said it, I had never heard that phrase before, but I understood it immediately. It’s not just some hedonistic axiom for ‘do what you want,’ it’s a philosophy in and of itself. Glor said, ‘I don’t even care,’ as in ‘I’m not going to stop you, so neither should you.’
“I told more of my friends. I told my teachers. I bought feminine clothes with my allowance money. And finally, I told my parents, whom I had convinced myself would never accept me, despite never having a shred of evidence to think so. If I let myself stop my progress toward it, I wouldn’t be here today. I wouldn’t have helped plan this event. I wouldn’t have raised the trans flag on the steps at the State House. I wouldn’t have run for SAGA president. I wouldn’t be in SAGA, and I wouldn’t be out of the closet.
“Many, many trans people live in families or communities that won’t accept them, and I don’t mean to belittle that experience. I’m incredibly fortunate and grateful for two living accepting parents, my Auntie Glor, and all of my wonderful friends. However, the fear inflicted by the hate of transphobia breaks us down, rots our minds, and it must be quelled.
“You would be surprised how much love is still left in this world. To anyone at home watching or listening, anyone in the crowd who’s considering taking a step forward in their identity, or even to people deep in their transition: Carpe diem. Refuse to settle for people who won’t accept you and join communities that will find small ways to embrace your gender identity, daily, through makeup, clothes, or programmer socks. Refuse to be beaten down by the hate and evil of this world. I’ve seen too many girls give up because of it. I’ve seen too many beautiful people take their own lives.
“They’re afraid of you because they know we hold the keys to the future, a future where the world is ours and we seize the day. I’ve learned that, through all of this, the best act of resistance is to enjoy yourself and the life you live.
“But you can’t do it alone. Nobody can, and I couldn’t. Communities like SAGA are here for you, and the door is open. GSAs like ours at NK have helped create a more inclusive space and develop school policy in a more enlightened way. But arguably most importantly, so many trans people have been able to come out and express themselves in their school communities. I’ve seen it change the lives of people, and that’s why GSAs are so important and why we need leaders who will act and create these communities to help others.
“If I can inspire one person to create that change here today, then my goal is complete. I love running the Sexuality and General Alliance. I loved marching in the parade today. I love speaking here today, and I love standing up for my trans brothers, sisters, and siblings. All trans people are beautiful both in body and in spirit, and you deserve the gifts of life and love. It will get better, but only if we act. And when we do, there is nothing that will stop us. Carpe diem, and thank you.”
“This is our third pride celebration in North Kingstown, and it is so wonderful to see it get bigger and bigger every year, to see more partners and families celebrating the LGBTQ+ community,” said State Senator Bridget Valverde. “I am a proud ally, and I know that my other colleague in the Rhode Island Senate, Senator Alana DiMario, also marched today. We strive to work together every day to promote equality and protect our community. We are lucky to live in a town and a state that have prioritized protecting people.
“I was asked to talk about a couple of things that are happening at the state level to protect the LGBTQ+ community, because as we know, at the federal level, there’s a lot of hatred being spewed. Whether it is investing in our community health centers that provide medically and culturally appropriate trans care, passing a data privacy act to make sure that everyone’s medical information is protected, or protecting the reproductive and gender affirming care providers that people need, we’ll protect them. I want you to know that we will continue doing everything we can, working every day, to protect the community.”
“I know what you want to do is spend your time listening to a bunch of people talk. You’ve had a student who was really great and a politician who is not bad, but a preacher? I mean, that’s about as bad as it gets, right?” joked the Reverend Donny Anderson.
“I love Pride, and I love to get to as many Pride celebrations as possible because it’s wonderful to celebrate.
“Let’s remember, Pride began as a protest. It began by saying, "We are not going to sit back, be in a corner, and let people push us around, tell us that we are not authentic, or that we’re not real human beings, and that we don’t deserve to have our authentic selves lifted up because we do. And you do.
“I hope, whether it’s something up at the State House or here in your own school committee, that rather than stay home and be relaxed on a cold winter night, come out, testify, and support people like your legislators here who are fighting hard for you. They need our support because let me tell you, not everybody at the State House has their perspective. Let’s make sure they have it.
“But I have some good news for you today, and that is this: Although people may hate us (and some really do), I want you to know that hate doesn’t work. Let me tell you about three powers you have: The first is the power of your personhood. You are an authentic person. You have value. You have your own, unique things, so you don’t have to conform to what somebody else says you have to do to be real, authentic, and make a difference.
“The second is that you have the power of community. Look at all of us today. Yesterday, I attended the transgender health conference at Rhode Island College. There must have been 400 people there; half of them were trans folks. The other half were medical and mental health professionals coming together to support our LGBTQIA+ community. We have power in community.
“I understand, especially for those of you who are younger and part of our community, I get it. When you turn on the tube and you see the horrible lies that are being told about you and about us, sometimes what we want to do is curl back into our little corner and not do anything. But you have friends. There are people who love and care about you. Let yourself be part of the community. I love the fact that there’s a group at the school where students can get together, regardless of their background. Find a group of people and the power of community.
“The last thing I want to tell you is that you’ve got the power of love. Martin Luther King took a quote from a 19th-century preacher, and he said, ‘The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends towards justice.’ Listen, it feels like we’re losing right now. It can feel like the world is collapsing in on us. And I know that some of you, especially in the trans community, feel that way. But understand this: Love wins. I saw that on some t-shirts today and love it. Love wins. Hate does not win.
“King said that you can’t overcome hate with hate. The only way to overcome hate is with love. And you have the power of love. You are not powerless. These turkeys in Washington cannot destroy your life. They cannot do that; we will not let them. We will stand together, and we’ll stand in love. God bless you. Have a great Pride.”
Supporting organizations include: Black Lives Matter PAC – RI, Youth Pride, Thundermist, Rhode Island Department of Health (RIDOH), The Womxn Project, Haus of Codec, PFLAG of Greater Providence, State Senators Bridget Valverde and Alana M. DiMario, and the South County Prevention Coalition.
